(via antlol666)


nicolebehary:

too little too late - an early to mid 2000s throwback playlist - l i s t e n -

that’s so raven theme raven symone // bootylicious destiny’s child // sk8er boi avril lavigne // beautiful soul  jesse mccartney // hollaback girl gwen stefani // too little too late jojo // start of something new high school musical cast // since u been gone kelly clarkson // crazy in love beyoncé // lucky britney spears // cheetah love cheetah girls // can’t get you out of my head kylie minogue  // everytime we touch cascada // like whoa  aly and aj // fergalicious fergie // if we were a movie  hannah montana // all star smash mouth // girlfriend avril lavigne // we’re all in this together high school musical cast // hips don’t lie shakira // candyman christina aguilera // the best of both worlds hannah montana // we belong together mariah carey // keep holding on avril lavigne // push it to the limit corbin blue // no scrubs tlc // cinderella cheetah girls // barbie girl aqua  // overprotected britney spears // milkshake kelis

nicolebehary:

too little too late - an early to mid 2000s throwback playlist - l i s t e n -

that’s so raven theme raven symone // bootylicious destiny’s child // sk8er boi avril lavigne // beautiful soul  jesse mccartney // hollaback girl gwen stefani // too little too late jojo // start of something new high school musical cast // since u been gone kelly clarkson // crazy in love beyoncé // lucky britney spears // cheetah love cheetah girls // can’t get you out of my head kylie minogue  // everytime we touch cascada // like whoa  aly and aj // fergalicious fergie // if we were a movie  hannah montana // all star smash mouth // girlfriend avril lavigne // we’re all in this together high school musical cast // hips don’t lie shakira // candyman christina aguilera // the best of both worlds hannah montana // we belong together mariah carey // keep holding on avril lavigne // push it to the limit corbin blue // no scrubs tlc // cinderella cheetah girls // barbie girl aqua  // overprotected britney spears // milkshake kelis

(via hellawiggins)


thisiseverydayracism:

iwriteaboutfeminism:

Protesters canvass the neighborhood of County Prosecutor Bob McCulloch.


Saturday, August 30th.

SIGNAL BOOST

(via boilingcocacola)


fairhies:

If I reply with “oh” I either don’t give a fuck or I feel like i’ve been punched in the throat

(via american-cinephile)



1. Trauma permanently changes us.

This is the big, scary truth about trauma: there is no such thing as “getting over it.” The five stages of grief model marks universal stages in learning to accept loss, but the reality is in fact much bigger: a major life disruption leaves a new normal in its wake. There is no “back to the old me.” You are different now, full stop.

This is not a wholly negative thing. Healing from trauma can also mean finding new strength and joy. The goal of healing is not a papering-over of changes in an effort to preserve or present things as normal. It is to acknowledge and wear your new life — warts, wisdom, and all — with courage.

2. Presence is always better than distance.

There is a curious illusion that in times of crisis people “need space.” I don’t know where this assumption originated, but in my experience it is almost always false. Trauma is a disfiguring, lonely time even when surrounded in love; to suffer through trauma alone is unbearable. Do not assume others are reaching out, showing up, or covering all the bases.

It is a much lighter burden to say, “Thanks for your love, but please go away,” than to say, “I was hurting and no one cared for me.” If someone says they need space, respect that. Otherwise, err on the side of presence.

3. Healing is seasonal, not linear.

It is true that healing happens with time. But in the recovery wilderness, emotional healing looks less like a line and more like a wobbly figure-8. It’s perfectly common to get stuck in one stage for months, only to jump to another end entirely … only to find yourself back in the same old mud again next year.

Recovery lasts a long, long time. Expect seasons.

4. Surviving trauma takes “firefighters” and “builders.” Very few people are both.

This is a tough one. In times of crisis, we want our family, partner, or dearest friends to be everything for us. But surviving trauma requires at least two types of people: the crisis team — those friends who can drop everything and jump into the fray by your side, and the reconstruction crew — those whose calm, steady care will help nudge you out the door into regaining your footing in the world. In my experience, it is extremely rare for any individual to be both a firefighter and a builder. This is one reason why trauma is a lonely experience. Even if you share suffering with others, no one else will be able to fully walk the road with you the whole way.

A hard lesson of trauma is learning to forgive and love your partner, best friend, or family even when they fail at one of these roles. Conversely, one of the deepest joys is finding both kinds of companions beside you on the journey.

5. Grieving is social, and so is healing.

For as private a pain as trauma is, for all the healing that time and self-work will bring, we are wired for contact. Just as relationships can hurt us most deeply, it is only through relationship that we can be most fully healed.

It’s not easy to know what this looks like — can I trust casual acquaintances with my hurt? If my family is the source of trauma, can they also be the source of healing? How long until this friend walks away? Does communal prayer help or trivialize?

Seeking out shelter in one another requires tremendous courage, but it is a matter of life or paralysis. One way to start is to practice giving shelter to others.

6. Do not offer platitudes or comparisons. Do not, do not, do not.

“I’m so sorry you lost your son, we lost our dog last year … ” “At least it’s not as bad as … ” “You’ll be stronger when this is over.” “God works in all things for good!”

When a loved one is suffering, we want to comfort them. We offer assurances like the ones above when we don’t know what else to say. But from the inside, these often sting as clueless, careless, or just plain false.

Trauma is terrible. What we need in the aftermath is a friend who can swallow her own discomfort and fear, sit beside us, and just let it be terrible for a while.

7. Allow those suffering to tell their own stories.

Of course, someone who has suffered trauma may say, “This made me stronger,” or “I’m lucky it’s only (x) and not (z).” That is their prerogative. There is an enormous gulf between having someone else thrust his unsolicited or misapplied silver linings onto you, and discovering hope for one’s self. The story may ultimately sound very much like “God works in all things for good,” but there will be a galaxy of disfigurement and longing and disorientation in that confession. Give the person struggling through trauma the dignity of discovering and owning for himself where, and if, hope endures.

8. Love shows up in unexpected ways.

This is a mystifying pattern after trauma, particularly for those in broad community: some near-strangers reach out, some close friends fumble to express care. It’s natural for us to weight expressions of love differently: a Hallmark card, while unsatisfying if received from a dear friend, can be deeply touching coming from an old acquaintance.

Ultimately every gesture of love, regardless of the sender, becomes a step along the way to healing. If there are beatitudes for trauma, I’d say the first is, “Blessed are those who give love to anyone in times of hurt, regardless of how recently they’ve talked or awkwardly reconnected or visited cross-country or ignored each other on the metro.” It may not look like what you’d request or expect, but there will be days when surprise love will be the sweetest.

9. Whatever doesn’t kill you …

In 2011, after a publically humiliating year, comedian Conan O’Brien gave students at Dartmouth College the following warning:

"Nietzsche famously said, ‘Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.’ … What he failed to stress is that it almost kills you.”
Odd things show up after a serious loss and creep into every corner of life: insatiable anxiety in places that used to bring you joy, detachment or frustration towards your closest companions, a deep distrust of love or presence or vulnerability.

There will be days when you feel like a quivering, cowardly shell of yourself, when despair yawns as a terrible chasm, when fear paralyzes any chance for pleasure. This is just a fight that has to be won, over and over and over again.

10. … Doesn’t kill you.

Living through trauma may teach you resilience. It may help sustain you and others in times of crisis down the road. It may prompt humility. It may make for deeper seasons of joy. It may even make you stronger.

It also may not.

In the end, the hope of life after trauma is simply that you have life after trauma. The days, in their weird and varied richness, go on. So will you.

Catherine Woodiwiss, “A New Normal: Ten Things I’ve Learned About Trauma”  

geesh this was nice to read

(via underunderstood)

(via notownedbyyourlabels)


enattendantlesoleil:

saying “that’s how things are” is incredibly useless when talking about social issues because yes, we are aware that that’s how things are, and we don’t like it, that’s the whole point

congratulations on providing no useful input to the conversation

(via pleasecallmesteve)


(via 17fmoon)


auwa:

friendly reminder: owning up to, learning from, and apologizing for your mistakes can go a long way


Q
what did jontron do?
Anonymous
A

slunchy:

he used the word “retarded” (which is no longer an acceptable term to describe anyone with intellectual disabilities) as a negative word to describe a game console and a fan asked him politely over twitter not to do that, which, you know, is a reasonable request, seeing as it’s incredibly fucking offensive:

but jontron, being the empathetically stunted and ethically bankrupt gamer beardo we all knew in our heart of hearts that he was, blew up the entire thing, tried cracking jokes that were shitty even if you didn’t care about the slur, and generally acted like a huge asshat about it. Neil Cicierga called Jon out on twitter, telling him he was being a huge douchecanoe, and in response Jon just gushed at Neil, telling him he loved his work etc. completely ignoring the point at hand.

and then, just when you thought that you could pick up the shambles that remain of your loving devotion to Jontron’s quirky chubby gamer antics and reassemble some form of acceptance and tolerance for him as a person, he went on to call out Tim Schafer, who linked a video about violence against female gamers, and started attacking Tim about how men are depicted just as poorly as women are, exposing his final form to his fans: a whiny, self-important holier-than-thou MRA fucktruck whose only purpose in life is to prove everyone wrong about everything that isn’t about white male neckbeards.


and lo, built on nothing but piggybacking on Egoraptor’s success and cheetos dust, Jontron’s sprawling empire begins to crumble and collapse beneath him. former fans look on, horrified. i sit back and sip on a big mug of “i told you so.”


dreadqueer:

Literally all she did was point out misognyistic tropes in a video games, and this is the aftermath. Men continually prove feminism correct and necessary.

dreadqueer:

Literally all she did was point out misognyistic tropes in a video games, and this is the aftermath. Men continually prove feminism correct and necessary.

(via antlol666)


nosynonymforsynonym:

Easiest skirt in history! You need 42”x42” fabric and enough 1” or 2” elastic  to go around your waist.

1. CUT

Fold the fabric in 4 and cut a nice curve. To cut the inside curve, use this chart.

2. HEM

Roll the end of the fabric over your finger and stitch.

3. WAIST

Cut the elastic to the width of your waist. Stitch ends together to create a loop. use pins to help line it up with your fabric

4. ASSEMBLE

Stitch the elastic to the fabric and… you’re already done!

(via the-strangest-sea)


pansexuals-labyrinthian:

hmu if u need t0m@to3$


the-strangest-sea:

dorky cosette human

(via the-strangest-sea)


nbronten:

Rowan and Eden are a coupla cuties weirdos sweeties

nbronten:

Rowan and Eden are a coupla cuties weirdos sweeties